Unauthorized Saved By the Bell Twitter Transcript

Ok, so I didn’t get to watch this live exactly, I went out of town all of a sudden. Surprise! But they re-aired it twice more, so no biggie!

Y’all. It was SO bad! Completely excellent.

I know I'm COMPLETELY late on ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory , had to go out of town. But I'm taking the late shift!

So the most important thing in casting was getting the hair correct, right? ‪#priorities ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

‪#ScreechBitchFace ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

I am SURE it's that easy to get a show decided upon, with a stupid "oh...alright!" grin ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Screech looks like senior Screech, while Zack looks like middle school Zack. ‪#awkward ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Hayley Mills my ass... ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Belding's voice is pretty good though. ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Youngest by far? What-the-fuck-ever. ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

There's nothing I could say about Slater's face that wouldn't be incredibly insulting ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Did everyone have to call her "Tiffani Amber" constantly? ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Ok. Creeper, Slater. ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Would Lisa Turtle really ever wear anything that tame? ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Hahaha, having directed a lot of teens, it is ridiculous to freak out after the 1ST run through. Good lord ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

THAT was an impressive example of his dancing?... ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

You're such a buzzkill, Tiffani Amber! ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Totes need this soundtrack ‪#WordUp ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Hell yeah. The brick phone. ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

There truly are no words for how bad the acting is for this. ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

HA! "The young cast was clearly chosen for their looks and not their talent" How meta. ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Oh shit! Sexy Slater! Oh noes!!! ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

We demand Very Special Episodes, damn it! ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

No Tiffani Amber. No, you are not good actors. ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Lord. So much teenage douchebaggery. ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Ummmm...he DID say it to your face... ‪#dumbass ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Y'all, I loved me some Violet. ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

...I'm getting bored... ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

YEEEEESSSS!!!! It's coming! ‪#ImSoExcitedImSoScared ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Snort! ‪#screechlaugh ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

So Screech turns into an alcoholic the same say they rehearse ‪#ImSoExcitedImSoScared ? Life is awesome. ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Was Lark EVER happy? ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

I'm guessing that was the little girl from earlier? ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Screech, the Drunken Karate Kid ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

...is that guy Screech's assistant now or something? I'm confused. ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Screech got drunk and laid! Huzzah! ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Not by the guy in the previous tweet, just to be clear. At least, I don't think so... ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

What IS Saved By the Bell without Zack and Kelly? ‪#truerwords ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

ALL THE TEARS!!! ‪#notreally ‪#totallylying ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Oh Mark Paul. You. Are. Such. A. Bad. Ass. ‪#whatever ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

...what? Dustin Diamond came up with TWSS? What-the-fuck-ever. ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Omg! SBtB blackmail?! Say it isn't so! ‪#notreally ‪#dontcare ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

And Zack looks like he's graduating from 8th grade. ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Are flashbacks really necessary in a 2 hour TV movie??? ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

So that woman is responsible for the College Years and the New Class? ‪#imighthateyou ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Yeah, that kid is way too adorable to portray Dustin Diamond. ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

Hahaha "The End...ish" in script. SO DRAMATIC. Way to class it up there at the end! ‪#UnauthorizedSavedByTheBellStory

So, overall? Hilariously bad, but NOTHING ACTUALLY INTERESTING EVER HAPPENED. I do not understand exactly what the point of making this was. But, it amused me.

And here’s this, just to amuse you:

 The Ultimate Guide To “Saved By The Bell” Fashion

For the record, I was completely a Zack girl. I was a sucker for the longest time for that damn 90’s haircut. So, what about you? Zack or Slater?

So, hey. Guess what?

I'm not actually dead, y'all!

I know, you're probably thinking, "Bitch, I don't care. You totally abandoned us, and left us bereft of snarky goodness." And you would totally be right in thinking that. I am a bad, BAD blogger, and I apologize.

So, just what the hell have I been up to, then? Here's a quick look at my my meager excuses:

• Most of my time has been taken up by being in charge of getting this built

           Still not totally finished, but the hard parts are done.

• Taught my six-year-old niece how use a level and a miter saw while working on the set. She is my Mini-Me.

• Obtained this injury

I know, right? I'm kinda proud of it.

• Got in SO MUCH trouble with my friends for letting the above happen, and now they all feel like they have to babysit me. Hmmph.

• Had a totally fantastic geeky time with said friends welcoming Doctor Who back

• Followed by a rousing game of this

Highly recommended

• And then a delightfully girly talk with one of my goddaughters and another friend's daughter. They are BSC ages, btw, and I love these girls to death, and they really are mature, but I would have a terribly hard time leaving them completely in charge of other children.

• And that brings us up to this week, which, in all seriousness, is my Holy Week. You might think I'm being facetious, but I'm truly not. Ready?

          College football is my religion.

           True facts, y'all. I'm not a follower of the "real" religions. This is what does it for me. I have all the same fervor that a tongue-speaking snake-handler has. I just curse at players and refs, and the only animals involved are mascots. My team is the Longhorns, but I love ALL college football. I will watch literally any game that is on, anytime. And everyone knows that the first full Saturday of college ball (which is tomorrow) is the day I call my Christmas. I'm looking at approximately 17 hours of football related viewing. I can't wait!

So yeah, that's what I've been up to. I've enjoyed my break, but I miss writing the blog. So, I'm looking at starting back up again next week. Not everyday, there are still theatre type things that must be done, but a few times a week.

BUT, before then...don't forget that Monday, September 1st, we have what is sure to be a cinematic masterpiece, the Lifetime Unauthorized Saved By the Bell Story coming up! And you know I'm going to be live tweeting the shit out of this. So join me, won't you? Preferably with an alcoholic beverage of your choice.

Boo. And. Bullfrogs.

Bleh, bleh, bleh.

Y'all, I am a sucky blogger. Two real posts this week? What. The. Fuck?

This week got surprisingly busy. And really, I'm heading into a really busy time. Plus, we're going into MY personal holiday time of year. Not religious, but the same fervor.

So what am I saying? Am I just leaving you hanging, like Dawn loves to just up and leave the BSC? Well, hell no! I just can't promise any sort of consistent schedule, for probably the next couple of months. But I'll still be here, reading and blogging away. It's what I do. And I know ya'll have become addicted to me and my blogging charms.

Ummm...yeah.

So, thanks for sticking with me. I'm really loving doing the blog, and knowing y'all think way too hard about fictional characters along with me.

And in case you're curious about what I'm doing away from this, follow along on the Twitter. I'll probably be all over that.